All that glistens...

Focus: I think I don't have it at all when I'm on my laptop. My desktop might be better for work, but the laptop is just so much better for everything else! - nice screen, fast processor, up-to-date software. And it's got so much of what I like - music, a way to connect with friends, audio and video chat. How fun! And over the years I've gotten lots of work done with laptops too. When I'm working I usually put away all the fun glowing windows and set the thing up so that there's one big black screen that looks like an old terminal. Then I write code or something like that.

But in daily life at the office, the computer just sits there beckoning me to watch things on YouTube, or to check my email. If my office-mates are noisy, then I can listen to music instead. (The only problem here is that the noise in the office eventually dies down, but the music goes on potentially forever.)

So it's not entirely clear that I "have problems focusing". The problem might be that I have a spiffy new laptop to play with. Of course, when the other option is doing work... well, again, there's the difference between work that's going well, and work that isn't going well. If I was working with my friends (and probably I would have the laptop with me then), we'd be chatting a lot in person -- about work -- and there wouldn't be any reason to distract myself with entertainments. On the other hand, in the isolating-in-proximity open-floor-plan office, I don't really have anyone to talk to about work or about anything else. This would be fine if I was really good at what I'm trying to work on. I'd just put in my hours (like anyone else) and go home and relax.

But since I'm not all that good at it, I'm happy to find any distraction. Writing a paper? Reading some random news article or opinion piece? My mind works in mysterious ways (I say to myself), so why not feed in all sorts of oddities and see what comes out? Maybe it will be something creative.

And, indeed, there's nothing wrong with publishing a few extra papers (assuming they get accepted) or even working on a book (since that helps me clarify my ideas) -- but it's not going to do me a whole lot of good if the main things I'm supposed to be working on don't get finished. It seems like I have to tell myself, slow progress is better than no progress. Like in Infotention and "The Pale King", it's OK if the work isn't all that interesting!

Besides, I'd be better at it if I took some kind of training course, given that I can't just sit with my friends and work in person in a kind of "immersion" environment. And I can at least create my own "immersion" by not messing around with the laptop and all of the fun it promises when I'm at work. (Then again, keeping the laptop at home does pose the threat that I'll never leave the house.)

It seems like there's something so painful about facing work (again, especially when it's something I'm not good at, and especially when I'm alone) that I'd almost rather do anything else. Removing all the major distractions should help. And getting better at the task should help as well. Working with other people would be great too. I think it's the isolating or isolated way I'm used to working that makes the experience painful. If I'm making steady progress with friends, then work is pretty much bliss.

By the way, Leni Riefenstahl, director of "Triumph of the Will", points out that if there's any message in the film, it's one of "work" and "peace". According to her, Hitler wasn't talking at that time about war or about racial theories or anti-semitism, he was just talking about the things everyone wanted. But it's not entirely clear that her version of the truth is the most true or accurate version. Susan Sontag wrote about the film, " the document (the image) is no longer simply the record of reality; 'reality' has been constructed to serve the image." However, it's not entirely clear that she's right about that, either.

Point being, I guess, that all that glistens isn't gold. The nice shiny 'reality' of the consumer-grade personal computer and the internet is potentially wrapped up with the isolating, post-industrial, state of affairs in office life -- and with the escapist tendencies of a student or office worker who hasn't yet figured out the proper way to make the adjustments to get what he or she needs in order to do good work. This sort of thing is a great prompt for "changing the context", and a call for something other than merely passing the time with anodyne entertainments or heterogeneous "background" thoughts and distractions.